I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
