K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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