uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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