If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
