guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
