it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
she woke up with a sticky ear
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize