I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
well most of my day revolves around power hour
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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