So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
