the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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