i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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