You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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