So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize