i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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