ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
