I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
