Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
