GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
