Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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