We won't sleep together?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
