Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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