No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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