"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
bring money and cleavage
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
