Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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