Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
