in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize