Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I have post one night stand depression
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