haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
