he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize