Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
