This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
