Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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