No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
