I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
