Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
How naked do you want me to be?
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