i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
