I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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