just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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