her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
