Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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