So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
