So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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