You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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