Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
worst night to have a conscience
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
