What a fucking waste of an outfit
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
