Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i was born a porn star she said
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
