Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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