Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
