Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
