One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
its not stalking. its research.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize