Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
