Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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