yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
